As your child heads off to preschool, have  you thought about what would be a successful experience for them? Is it preparing to get all A’s? Is it getting into the “right” elementary school, middle school, high school and then Harvard? Many parents have tended to reduce the school experience to these goals. However, there is actually so much more to be gained – things that will benefit them well beyond those college years.

For example, acquiring a love of learning. Parents promote this by enthusiastically supporting the process of learning rather than the outcomes.  Let children know that you don’t expect perfection but rather “best efforts” and “personal bests”, that you value the attempt over the outcome. This means that you need to allow your children to make mistakes and fail. Then your job is to teach your children a “winner’s mentality”. This means that failures and mistakes are opportunities to learn. Parents should promote trying, progress, and perseverance. We, of course, expect children to acquire knowledge but, just as importantly, to acquire the ability to think and analyze and to problem solve to achieve their goals. As parents set these as priorities at home, children will carry these perspectives into their school experience.  

Another way to promote school success is to make sure that your children have learned at home that the adults are in charge. When children respect the limits, boundaries and rules their parents set, they come to school ready to cooperate with teachers and to take directions that enable them to learn. Children with this mindset also get an extra boost to their self esteem because they know how to elicit positive feedback from the adults with whom they interact.

School success is also promoted when parents provide a beneficial home environment. This has several components.  First, creating a stable home environment with schedules and routines sets children up to get the most out of their school day and teaches organizational skills. You can do this by regulating their sleep with set times to go to bed and wake up that provide them with sufficient rest. Good nutrition is another important contributor. Have regular meal and snack times and watch the sugar and caffeine intake   (I know you don’t give your child coffee to jumpstart their day, but be aware that certain foods, beverages and medications contain a fairly good shot of caffeine).  Also, a calm, unrushed beginning to the day will help them arrive at school ready to learn. And be sure to arrive on time for school! Walking in late to an ongoing activity is disorienting for kids – they’ve missed the directions, have to catch up and have that embarrassing experience of everyone stopping to look at their entrance!

Success in school also happens when parents teach and model good work habits.  Let your children do for themselves all they CAN do without excessive help from you. This builds a sense of competency which is not only a self esteem booster but also good practice in functioning well in school.  Encourage perseverance and completion of tasks starting from a young age. And watch the number of extracurricular activities your child engages in. Young children, especially, benefit from free playtime in which they can make the most of their imagination and initiative.

Finally, school success is best achieved if there is an alliance between the school and parents. Be sure to let teachers know if there are changes in the home situation or events that effect your child. With this knowledge, teachers can provide extra understanding and support in the classroom. As well, be open to accepting feedback from the school as to where your child might be experiencing a problem or a lag so that, if necessary,  appropriate intervention can begin. It takes a “team” to maximize the school experience.

HAPPY SCHOOL YEAR 2023-2024!!!